I've spent a lot of time traveling over the last seven months. Enough to know that there are certain nuances that make my heart skip a beat and some that quite frankly make my armpits a little moist.
Here is my top ten list of things that make me nervous when traveling:
- Airport terminal renovations. Just when I’m starting to get comfortable they go and change things on me.
- Middle Eastern passengers (yep, I am a racial profiler) that abruptly stand up and move to the front of the plane to use the lavatory.
- Hearing the TSA (airport security) agent yell “Bag check. Sir, is this your bag?” Great, I hope everyone enjoys the free show again.
- When the captain comes on the speaker and says, “flight attendants take your seats.” And this right after they have given me a glass of cranberry juice filled to the brim. Gee, thanks. Do I just give you the dry cleaning bill or how does that work?
- The early morning flights. Is the flight crew even awake yet? Because I know I'm not. How come they only offer juice or coffee on those flights? I need a cranberry juice and a bag of gourmet peanuts. There goes my day.
- The moment at the gate when the lady says, “We’ll now board flight 1797 to Omaha.” Hmmm, is that on the way to Las Vegas?
- The plane is almost completely full. (Except for the seat right next to me) In walks a 350 pound Tongan that plays on the University of Utah’s offensive line. Does he see the other seat at the back? Please, do you see it? Don’t make eye contact. C’mon, look its right there next to the nice old lady…
- Guys that stand right next to me at the urinals when the other fourteen are vacant. Yeah, I know this is one of my pet peeves but it also makes me very nervous. Stay out of my bubble.
- Figuring out that the college kid I am sitting next to on the plane has ADDH and a full blown case of Tourette’s Syndrome. This becomes the longest 1:20 minute flight of my life.
- Airport security screeners that wear latex gloves.
PB
3 Comments:
When Ryan and I were coming home from our honeymoon we were delayed an hour while we sat and watched them work on the wing of the plane we were flying on. My most nervous on a plane ever. I kept expecting the wing to fall off mid-flight.
I just don't do well with the bad turbulence. And it is even better when the captain comes on and telss you that "we are experiencing a little turbulence" and you want to say, YA think?!"
Or the once when we were flying to Utah from Houston and they said there was bad weather in Denver, so we were going to have to circle for a while and then they said we were running out of gas. So then what do you do, just fall out of the sky when the gas tank is empty and pray for a soft landing? Seriously people!
Great list! Your lists always make me chuckle! Thanks!
Cranberry Juice? Really? When did you stop drinking Mountain Dew?
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